Self-help, Life coaching, Counsellors, Therapists, Psychologists, and Psychiatrists: What’s the difference?! What do I need? This post is about the many different ‘helping’ options out there to help you find the one that is right for you.

As JWs we were never encouraged to seek any form of mental health treatment outside of the organisation because the Governing Body quite simply knew that if you did, you would finally realise you were part of a high-control group and make a run for it. Once you are out however, you may very likely feel that you could use some help getting your life on track, but you may not quite know where to start when it comes to selecting or finding the help that you need.

There are all sorts of ‘helping’ options out there, and it can be a bit confusing if you have never had the freedom to seek help from these resources before. In this post I am going to give a brief overview of the types of help available and the types of issues they can be helpful for, based on my own experience and research. It is a bit Australia-centric given that is where I live, but the U.S has also been included where possible. Regardless of your country, the terms used are pretty universal so hopefully it is still helpful.

The ‘helping’ options

Self-help:

This is a massive industry. Anyone can contribute and anyone can access it. There are many extremely useful resources available online (including YouTube), and in book or course form. Much of it is based on personal experience and there are many fantastic contributions by experienced doctors, psychologists, and other mental health experts, as well as the general public and former JWs.

Self-help resources are fantastic for increasing your general understanding of yourself and your life, inter-personal relations, motivation, mental health topics, communication, boundaries, contentment, the list goes on. Knock yourself out, but, there are a few caveats: Given that there are many self-published authors out there, and no qualifications are needed, you could end up wasting some of your hard-earned cash on some useless info, and you may not realise it until it is too late.

Also, there is only so far that doing things by yourself can go. No amount of self-help can uncover the various blind-spots you may have, because when you take in information, you are taking it in through your own eyes and experience, which means that you unconsciously put your own interpretation on it. Sometimes, you need someone to hold up a mirror, and kindly point out things that you just can’t see for yourself.

See the JW Recovery Toolkit page for a bunch of resources which can be considered ‘self-help’ and which I have found helpful over the years.

In relation to specific ex-JW recovery self-help resources, this website can be considered one, and another is the Jehovah’s Witness resources page on Recovering from Religion. There are also many books written by former JWs which you may find helpful. Many are stories of personal experience in the religion, waking up, and the challenges of leaving, but there are several which focus on recovery after leaving, such as Bonnie Zieman’s ‘Exiting the JW cult: A healing handbook for current and former Jehovah’s Witnesses’.

Life-coaching:

Life coaching is a service aimed to help you with your motivation and happiness, through helping you define and pursue your own personal goals. There are various names for life coaches, such as ‘lifestyle gurus’, ‘wellness coaches’, ‘wellbeing mentors’, etc. Life coaching aims to help you with your personal productivity, motivation, and organisation. However, these areas are so closely related to mental health issues such as self-esteem, self-worth, depression, and anxiety, that a life coach can easily and accidentally stray into areas that they are not qualified to provide advice on.

This industry is not regulated, which means that there is no over-arching legal or professional body ensuring that any courses or qualification meet certain accreditation standards. This in-turn means that any courses claiming to be about life-coaching can pretty much teach anything, and anyone can call themselves a life coach, regardless of whether they have done any study or not. Life coaching also often adopts various new age philosophies which may sound attractive, but can actually be vague, difficult to personalise, and potentially harmful to someone who needs more specialised help.

While you may find an experienced, well-meaning coach doing good work, there is also a risk that you may find a coach who is barely experienced enough to call themselves a coach of any kind, and trusting them in anything even remotely related to mental health could do you more harm than good. They may simply not know enough about themselves to realise that they could to a lot of damage to a vulnerable person seeking help.

Entry to courses for health professionals that require accredited training, such as counsellors and psychologists, often include screening for anything which could affect their ability to be an effective practitioner, and those displaying risk factors are referred to therapy before they can continue their studies. This does not occur for life coaches. A good life-coach must be able to identify when they need to refer clients to a qualified mental health practitioner.

Only choose a life coach if you feel like you are generally emotionally and mentally stable and have a good support network otherwise. A life-coach may be the right choice if you really just need someone to act like a great friend who listens, encourages you and helps you get motivated, helps you work out what you want, and helps you stay on track to try and achieve it.

Your GP (General practitioner/Family doctor/or Primary Care Physician in the U.S):

Aside from various online help for former JWs, your GP/doctor can also be a good place to start. Your family doctor, GP, or primary care physician will have completed a six-year medical degree and have a broad range of experience, likely also including mental health. They can assess whether some professional help may be useful for you and then refer you to the practitioner or service they think will be the best fit. In saying that, it may be helpful to do some of your own work before approaching your GP/doctor because not all are familiar with the impact that a strict religious upbringing can have, let alone one with such high-control aspects such as the JWs. Without explaining your experience, there is a risk they could pop you on anti-anxiety or anti-depressant medication when all you really need is professional help from a counsellor or psychologist. However, sometimes a two-pronged approach may be required, which includes both medication and therapy with a counsellor or psychologist.

Before visiting your doctor, perhaps read up a bit on the impacts of a high-control group and think about how you have been affected. This will help you explain it to someone who has not experienced it, and also help your doctor work out the right level of care for you. See earlier posts: Coercive control: How being a JW is like being in an abusive relationship, and Which beliefs cause what: How our JW beliefs affect us.

Counsellors or therapists:

Counsellors and therapists are pretty much the same thing, but there is different terminology used depending on where you live. In Australia we tend to use ‘counsellors’, but in the U.S it seems that ‘therapist’ is more common. In the U.S, counselling is a legally regulated profession in every state. In Australia it is not legally regulated, however there are professional bodies which provide accreditation and most people seeking services will only use an accredited provider.

Counsellors and therapists have generally at least studied a diploma or at undergraduate level at university. Another pathway is for someone to do a Masters in Counselling. To qualify for a masters they must have an undergraduate degree from another discipline, or sufficient practice experience as a counsellor to compensate. A qualified counsellor or therapist is generally registered with a national body which oversees accreditation and national standards for accredited courses. In Australia, to be on the Register of Counsellors and Psychotherapists you must have successfully completed an accredited course.

Counsellors are often a first port of call in a short-term crisis situation such as sudden bereavement or life change, but can also provide longer-term psychotherapy depending on their experience and qualifications. Some of the most common areas counsellors help with are career and work issues, communication and interpersonal conflicts, grief and loss, stress, anxiety and depression, dealing with life changes and transitions (ie parenting, moving, divorce, leaving a high control religion, any big change really), trauma, addiction, and abuse of various kinds.

Counsellors and therapists are trained to listen fully, spot unhelpful patterns of thinking and behaviour, identify blind spots in your awareness, and reflect what they are hearing back at you in an understanding and safe environment, with the aim of helping you to come to your own realisations and conclusions. They may be trained in a range of therapeutic techniques, such as cognitive-behavioural-therapy (CBT), compassion-focussed therapy (CFT), and acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), and sometimes specialise in areas such as trauma, adolescent mental health, men’s or women’s health, or couples counselling.

Counsellors are not qualified to diagnose mental illness, but will refer you to someone who can if they believe that you need it. If you have a mental illness, a counsellor may still be able to provide helpful guidance and support, but if your illness is more acute or severe, they may refer you to a psychologist for a diagnosis if they believe that it will help or change your treatment.

Counsellors and therapists fulfil a vital role in helping people without severe mental illness to improve their quality of life. They are usually reasonably priced and aim to fit in with your schedule. It may take a few before you find one you want to stick with, but all are professional and understand that it is important to find the right fit (so they won’t take it personally if you ask for someone else).  

Psychologists:

Psychology is a fully regulated profession in both the U.S and Australia. Psychologists usually study for a minimum of 4 years for an undergraduate degree with honours and/or a masters, then they require at least one, but normally two years of supervised practice by a qualified psychologist before they themselves can be considered qualified. Some qualified psychologists do then go on to do a PhD, so may be called Dr, but they are not a qualified medical doctor and so cannot dispense medication.

A qualified psychologist is generally registered with a national body which oversees and administers accreditation (sets the standards for any accredited courses).

Psychologists are qualified to diagnose, manage, and treat, mental illness. They deal with mental health disorders such as anxiety, depression and other mood disorders, personality disorders, obsessive-compulsive disorders, somatoform disorders, eating disorders, developmental disorders (ie. ADHD and autism), schizophrenia, and so on. If you need a confirmed diagnosis, or your GP/doctor or counsellor believes one will be helpful in your treatment, it is a psychologist you will need to see.

Psychologists are often involved in the treatment of complex and co-morbid mental health issues. Co-morbidity refers to the presence of two or more illnesses in a patient at the same time, which makes diagnoses and treatment far more complicated. For example, anxiety and depression have high co-morbidity because they often occur together.  

Psychiatrists:

These guys are pretty much at the top of the helping profession tree. To qualify as a psychiatrist you must have completed six years of medical training to be a doctor, then on top of this, completed another five or six years of study to specialise in psychiatry. Psychiatrists are fully qualified medical doctors specialising in mental illness and can dispense medication. They generally see patients who have already been through the ‘system’ somewhat and require specialist intervention and medication.

Because they are at the top of the tree, psychiatrists tend to see patients with severe mental illnesses at crucial times and only when they are needed. I have a relative who is a child psychiatrist and she actually finds this aspect of her profession frustrating. She wants to be there for her patient’s full journey, but the way the system is structured does not currently allow this. In purely pragmatic and cost driven terms I can understand this. A stretched and understaffed health system is not going to want a psychiatrist who has studied for 11 years taking the time to do anything which could be done by others. They are just going to want to engage their expertise for as short a time as possible to provide them with the best course of treatment for a particular patient. Not that I’m saying it wouldn’t be useful for both the psychiatrist and the patient to have more time and engagement, just that I can understand why this is often not possible.

Here is a summary of the ‘helping’ options, including the relevant qualifications and accreditation standards, the pros and cons of each, and a general guide to cost.

Matrix: Navigating the ‘helping’ options:

I hope this helps you to find the right help for you, if you feel you need it.

Wishing you all the best in your recovery.

Renee :o)